Sunday, September 20, 2009

my penance <3

The Beginning

Nothing can prepare me. Nothing can prepare me, no matter what I do to prepare myself, I know, That nothing can prepare me. This was my mantra the entire day before arriving at Saint Josephs Peace Abbey in Spencer Massachusetts. I have been there a few times, "back in the day" I guess you could say, and it has always been a special place to me. There is something about the vast meadows, rolling hillsides and amazing architecture that just seems to always hit home.

Years ago when I made my first significant journey there I had an amazing experience that I deem as a time in my life that "began my spiritual journey". I didn't know that what I was looking for was God and I sure didn't expect that I would ever find him, or that it would take me what seems now, like lifetimes. I always confused myself with everyone else's opinion about what God is, Or who he is, Or what he has or has not done for them and I never stopped and listened to myself.

Back on that special night we that we had went.  A group of us.  We arrived like tired marching ants that go in numbers accept by automobile. We journied to  to the chapel on a cold fall evening to bestow ourselves upon the observence of the Trappists Monks. Public is welcome to their everyday ceremonies, however, they remain seperated by the Church building itself. If you're lucky enough you can catch a good sight of them while your visiting the Chapel...but it's hardly ever that you get to see any kind of action.

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the only things you need to know [about me]

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i'm a farmers wife and a proud mother of two boys. i was born in the 80's, but shoulda been the 30's. nature is my heaven and i enjoy talking to animals. i'm a collector of heart shaped rocks and a believer in angels. if you were to catch me on my worst day i'd be having an anxiety attack over someone elses problem - catch me on my best day and i'm singing a lovely song or playing the guitar. classic rock is my preferred genre of music and i've been a story teller since i was a young child. the farm is owned by the community and is located one mile from the famous walden pond. a piece of myself still resides in indiana where my mothers from. i live to spread hope. i live to thrive. i live to change.